Wednesday, April 04, 2007

"She sang very much in tune ... which is rare these days.": American Idol

I would complain again, but what's the use? And honestly, my reviews are just as rehashed as every episode of this show so, I'm really left without a leg to stand on. And were this Dancing With the Stars, I'd have a great transition.


Tonight was an episode that I was actually anticipating, as I figured that the source material would automatically be better, seeing as it was songs performed by Tony Bennett, however, as Todd pointed out, that leaves most contestants with a catalog to choose from that's even larger than "artists that inspired Gwen Stefani." Joy. Consider my bubble burst. Though, perhaps it was better to lower my expectations from the get go.

Let me just take a moment and do a little fashion critique for this episode: I was unaware that Tony Bennett had gotten second place at the Masters, as I imagine that's where one gets a yellow blazer along the lines of this. When Phil was working with the master, I couldn't help but fantasize about him taking Bennett's jacket and making the transformation complete. *sighs* In other events, Paula had a serious Hamburglar vibe going on, while Simon continued to tease Ryan by sporting a Fabio-esque, exposed chest shirt thing. *shudders* Weird.

1. Blake Lewis - "Mack the Knife": Blah. Lately, when Blake starts singing I find other things to do. I generally end up wandering out of the room and cleaning things, or going online and looking things up on Wikipedia. This is sad for me, since he's one of my favorites and yet, anymore, I'd just rather be doing something else. AND THIS IS DURING ONE OF MY FAVORITES. Not good. That said, his song was fine, it was a good choice, but man, could this have BEEN any more lackluster?

2. Phil Stacey - "Night and Day": Uhhh ... yeah, I've heard funeral dirges that were more upbeat than this. If that was Todd singing that to me, I'd hire a food tester. Seriously, has anyone* turned in consistently creepier performances than Phil Stacey? I thought not.

3. Melinda Doolittle - "I've Got Rhythm": I swear to God, I'm going to stop reviewing Melinda and Sanjaya for as long as they're in the competition. Doolittle was great. Not her best, not her worst.

4. Chris Richardson - "Don't Get Around Much Anymore":
I've been really tough on Richardson the last few weeks, but he was much better this week. I've always been most impressed with Richardson when he sings upbeat songs, because I think that if he has a future in music it'll be as a "performer" and not as a singer, and his Justin Timberlake impressions are much more palatable when he's moving around and DOING things as opposed to just looking soulfully into the camera.

5. Jordin Sparks - "On a Clear Day": Meh. This song was kinda sucky and Sparks did a fine enough job, but it was at this point that the show really started to feel like the Idol kids decided to clean out the barn and put on a show at the old folks home! Plus, for the first time, I got what Simon says about Sparks being almost over-the-top saccharine.

6. Gina Glocksen - "Smile": This was fine, but yet again showcased the point I made last week: Glocksen doesn't have the stuff to last. Unfortunate, but true.

7. Sanjaya Malakar - "Cheek to Cheek": As horrifying as last week was, Sanjaya actually was able to make it worse by showing up like a horrible Bee-Gee's/Miami Vice lovechild. Weird. That said, I actually kind of respect how he's stopped trying to impress the judges. The ultimate showman, Malakar has figured out that it's Grandmas and Gidgets that make or break this show, and the kid has both in his corner. (In five years, we'll all either be working for him, or dead by his hand. -- ed.)

8. Haley Scarnato - "Ain't Misbehavin": I think what I hate most about Haley Scarnato is that she makes me feel like a prude. I mean, I'm all for women using their sexuality to get ahead. And obviously this show is all about letting people wear what they want ... but every time I see her on screen I scream, "WHORE!" and throw things at big TV. Todd is violently against hurting Big TV in any way and suggests just watching her muted, but this suggestion leads me to throw things at HIM, so the matter is dropped. Ultimately, Scarnato is convinced that as long as she can avoid wearing a bra, she will be allowed to stay. It would be nice if SOMEONE could disprove this theory in short order. Also, she cannot sing. I want to make her wear a big scarlet A for Awful.

9. LaKisha Jones - "Stormy Weather": This was wonderful, despite the fact that she completely and blatently ignored the advice of Tony Bennett. To that extent, why even HAVE mentors? No one ever listens to them ... though honestly, what could Tony Bennett or Gwen Stefani teach these experts about becoming recording artists? Obviously nothing.

Great. Another mediocre hour of my life spent.

Tonight's winner: LaKisha
Tonight's loser: Haley
Tomorrow's loser: *fingers crossed* Haley

*Sanjaya is automatically disqualified from all 'most extreme' catagories, as, well, come on ...

2 comments:

NATHANIEL R said...

I sometimes feel like i am losing my mind when i watch this show because my reaction is inevitably the opposite of what the judges and the rest of america thinks.

for the first time ever I thought Lakisha was very "off" the song was too low for her. she had pitch problems and everyone still thought she was great.

weird.

and Jordi who is usually great had such trouble breathing during that song --weird uncomfortable phrasing and just not a good performance and the judges still loved.

i give up.

Libby said...

Oh, it's not just you ... I often disagree with the judges, and obviously, America, when it comes to this show, but then again, I also have my biases ... I want Jordin to stay, so to a certain extent I'll overlook pitchiness or weird breathing issues. And I'm generally just grasping at straws when it comes to LaKisha, as I don't find her especially engaging. *shrugs* I guess we just haven't tapped into the great AI hivemind as of yet ...