"You're not lactating. If our son wants to be near the milk, he'll have to sleep in the refrigerator.": Desperate Housewives
Raise your hand if you thought Victor was actually dead. Anyone?
Yeah, that's what I thought. Of all the annoying things this show has done, the foolish attempt to try to fool the audience into thinking Victor was dead somehow annoyed me the most. At this point in the season Gabby, Carlos, Edie and Victor are such a black hole of unlikable characters that it's hard to muster any sort of concern that one of them might die. Perhaps next week the big tornado will take all of them out. Now THAT would be satisfying!
Lynette got a meaty yet surprisingly dated storyline this week when her beloved stepfather (nicely played by Richard Chamberlian) returned after 30 years gone to help her with her estranged mother. The story was meaty because the acting was quite strong and the connection between Felicity Huffman and Chamberlain felt palpable, yet the entire thing took on a stale feel when we learned that the reason he left all those years ago is that he was gay and her mother was too ashamed to tell her daughters. Instead she allowed them to think she cheated on him, a fact which ate away at their relationship ever since. They've shown Lynette's mother to be something of a wild child and free spirit, so it's hard to understand why she would have kept this fact from her daughters all these years. Also, this story feels a bit perfunctory and done many times before. Still, it was nice to see Chamberlain and the acting was wonderful, making the story seem better than it probably was.
Bree and Orson went through another baby-fueled storyline when Bree decides to let the baby sleep in their bed, which causes quite the rift in their sex life. Bree eventually decides to, um..."service" Orson at his office instead, which pleases him. The best part of this story, however, is the ramifications it has on Andrew when he begins to believe that Bree is ashamed of him and has written him off in favor of the new baby. This leads to a poignant moment when Andrew reveals his disappointment that Bree has not noticed how much he's changed, and forgives her for leaving him on the side of the road to fend for himself all that time ago. I quite enjoy the character of Andrew and Shawn Pyfrom's performance, so this was a welcome development.
At the beginning of the season it seemed that Dana Delaney's character would be a great addition to the show, but it's becoming increasingly clear as the weeks go on that while Dana Delaney is wonderful, her storyline still falls far short of interesting. Her character doesn't make an appearance this week, but Adam's past does finally catch up with them when former, and quite possibly crazy, patient Sophie shows up at their doorstep. Adam shoos her away, but not before Mike sees her and uses that knowledge to convince Adam to give him a prescription for more meds (since he had to fire his dealer after he made a Susan-encouraged pass at Julie). Junkie Mike is boring, even when blackmailing someone for drugs. Was Mike always boring and I'm just realizing it now? I feel lost.
Despite my obvious ennui with almost everything involving this show lately, a few redeemable moments remain each week. Perhaps the best one was Adam casually reminding Orson that he knows all about the baby fakery in order to blackmail him into writing a prescription for pain pills, which Adam was then going to give to Mike in return for Mike's silence about Sophie's surprise visit. It's that sort of soapy secret plot that this show does well, and it was nice to see Nathan Fillion with a little more to do.
Next week: the MOST EXPENSIVE DESPERATE HOUSEWIVES EPISODE EVER! And two people will die! This better be good.